"You're fine. Just remember your ice skating lessons!"
"I only learnt how to fall over!"
- I didn't like it
- I fell over in such a manner that when I hit the ice my elbow drew a big question mark in blood on the ice
- I had to be rescued by a twelve year old boy
"Are you looking forward to this, kids?"
"Er, is that a yes?"
Secondly because they had to wear crash helmets that were adult sized. So the Boy looked like this;
|The Stig's bobble-headed cousin|
And finally because, from the moment they had their crash hats on the only thing they wanted to do was either punch each other in the face, or head butt each other. It was like a punch up at the National Association of Midget Bikers AGM. And when they eventually broke the fight up and got them on the quads - well. It turns out that when you put your average seven-year-old boy on a quad, they forget what a corner is. The whole time they were on the bikes they would ride in a straight line, stop when they got to a tyre wall and then look in bemusement over their shoulders at the two poor sods running the place. They would then get dug out of the tyre wall, let loose to ride in a straight line and repeat the whole process. I now know what the most soul destroying job in the world is. After five minutes of this I wanted to kill myself on their behalf.
Quasar was the biggest hit for the Boy it turns out - when I asked him what he enjoyed the most. Although when I asked why he replied;
"Because I shot Leon's dad in the nuts like, a hundred times!"